Recently, in worship, I saw an image of myself standing in a completely white-washed room. The accompanying words that I heard within were, “As if it never happened.” Although, I knew this word was for me, I felt it was also a word for the body of Christ. A word for those of us who have borne the marks of trauma, of past wounds, of things that have altered our minds and our daily lives to the extent that we find ourselves putting up walls and throwing up defenses, surviving but not truly thriving.
I believe in my spirit, that this could be the year that we stop reliving the past, that we stop living small to accommodate lingering pain and residual side effects of past events suffered, wrongs incurred, and mistakes made. This could be the year that we drop the survival tools and coping mechanisms that have kept us small. We could be free of the reminders that have kept us chained to the past and truly live free. Victorious. Abundant. This could be the year that we live as if it never happened. We could live new.
I believe in a God of healing and breakthrough. I believe that sometimes healing comes in an instant. (I’ve seen it). However, I believe that oftentimes healing comes from facing pain and digging into the process of working through it. (I’m living it). I’ve seen it too often that as we cross the threshold of a new year, we declare this is my year for healing! This is my year for promotion! This is my year for breakthrough! And then, we wait idly for the word to come to pass, and become disillusioned and feel like we heard wrong, or, worse, that maybe God didn’t fulfill his promise. I believe God desires that we live outside of the shadow of our past, but this is a word we can’t just idly hope for. This is a word to lean into, to dig into. To see this word come to pass, God may lead us through a process. He may take us on a journey that requires us to be vulnerable, uncomfortable, and to allow light into the places that we have kept hidden away for so long.
Whatever it looks like for you, I believe healing is possible. Freedom is within your grasp. This year is a year you don’t have to keep looking back, look forward. Breathe deeply. Be present. Dream. No longer do the lies not good enough, damaged, or broken need to hold you back from experiencing all that you are capable of. This is the year to fly.
2 comments
Hello Sister in Christ, I would be one you would consider a hot mess. This was an amazing blog. You are so correct, we have lived our life based on our past mistakes and failures. But what we are missing here is that God only sees Jesus when he looks at us. And that my friend, is a huge comfort that he doesn’t remember all of my sin and selfishness. However, I do and moving past it and not condemning myself as a failure is so hard. I try to stay close to the feet of Jesus and as life moves on I have days where I am not so close to him. Because of the busyness of our everyday life. I love the thought of as if it had never happened.
Yes, he makes all things new. It is a process but He is faithful to guide us through it.