Song of Songs 1:5-6, 9-11 (TPT)
The Shulamite
Jerusalem maidens, in this twilight darkness[j]
I know I am so unworthy—so in need.
The Shepherd-King
Yet you are so lovely!
The Shulamite
I feel as dark and dry as the desert tents
of the wandering nomads.[k]
The Shepherd-King
Yet you are so lovely—
like the fine linen tapestry hanging in the Holy Place.
The Shepherd-King
My dearest one,[p]
let me tell you how I see you—
you are so thrilling to me.
To gaze upon you is like looking
at one of Pharaoh’s finest horses—
a strong, regal steed pulling his royal chariot.[q]
Your tender cheeks are aglow—
your earrings and gem-laden necklaces
set them ablaze.
We will enhance your beauty,[r]
encircling you with our golden reins of love.
You will be marked with our redeeming grace.[s]
Shame…
Shame is something that we have all dealt with at one point or another. In the passage above, the Shulamite represents us and the Shepherd King represents Jesus. Notice the words she uses to describe herself: unworthy, in need, dark, dry, wandering. But notice what the Shepherd King says about her, “Let me tell you how I see you…” Lovely, thrilling, strong, regal, beautiful, encircled with love and marked by redeeming grace.
What is shame? Conviction says, “I did something wrong.” Shame says, “I am something wrong.” Shame comes from Hell and is meant to keep us from walking in full understanding and confidence in our God given identity.
Shame says I am bad. There is something wrong with me. Shame leaves us never fully able to accept ourselves. Shame is that thing that makes us search for a reason why we are not good enough every time we are presented with an opportunity to walk in our purpose. Shame leads us to us continuously explain to others why we aren’t worthy. Shame tells us that we are unlovable as we are. It tells us that if others knew the truth about us, they would shake their heads in disgust and walk away. Shame only values perfection and devalues progress and growth. Shame always has a reason why we can’t enjoy a blessing. Shame tells us that being in process is unacceptable. Shame tells us that we are the only ones in process and that everyone else has it figured out. Shame tells us we are damaged beyond repair. Shame makes us live in a distorted reality, where lies are true and govern our behavior, putting boundaries around what we believe God can use us to do. Shame magnifies our weaknesses and elevates our flaws to a place where we feel they are bigger than God’s willingness to overcome them. Shame clouds our vision from seeing that we are absolutely and totally loved by God, even at our worst.
So how do we kick shame to the curb?
Reject the lies.
In order to see the power of shame broken off of our lives, we must become aggressive truth hunters. We must begin the process of identifying every lie we have believed and replacing it with the truth of what God says about us. This is a process we must be willing to repeat. When faced with lies that continue to feel true, we keep putting the truth before us. Returning to this process of lie detection and truth seeking is what helps us to sustain our breakthrough.
We must refuse to believe that anything is just the way it is. That it must always be this way. If we believe that, we give ourselves an out from our responsibility to pursue healing and growth. If we accept anything less than what God has intended for us, we deny ourselves of our healing, our freedom, and the abundant life God has for us. Give yourself permission to walk in your new identity and the truth that God says about you.
Receive love.
V. 9 We will enhance your beauty, encircling you with our golden reins of love. You will be marked with our redeeming grace.
God’s love is what enhances our beauty as we blossom and grow. It is his redeeming grace that liberates us from the bondage of shame, fear and insecurity. But receiving His love is the key that unlocks the prison cell.
Earlier this year, I had a conversation with someone that had a profound impact on my heart. I was in a moment where I felt overwhelmed by the amount of brokenness in my life. God had exposed several areas of my heart that He was targeting for healing and that can be a painful process to walk through.
As I explained to someone very close to me, all the ways I was feeling and everything I was working through, I think a part of me expected them to in some way shape or form reject me or choose to distance themselves. Surely if I felt this overwhelmed by my mess they would be overwhelmed too. As if this person didn’t hear anything I said about all my mess, my pain and my struggle, they looked at me and said, “More than anything else I need you to understand what you deserve. That you deserve to be loved.”
This person understood that if I didn’t believe that I deserved the opportunities God was giving me and if I didn’t recognize that I deserved to be loved, I would find a way to reject love, push away opportunities and keep myself from enjoying the things that God had intended to be a gift.
It wasn’t the mess, the pain or the struggles that would keep me from moving forward. It wasn’t any of the things I felt disqualified me from my purpose. The only thing that could stop me would be my refusal to accept God’s love, the love of others he placed around me, as well as my refusal to love myself right where I was, no matter where I found myself in the process.
In order to see shame fall off our lives and walk in the fullness of our identity, we must allow ourselves to be loved and to love ourselves while we are still in process. If we wait till we feel as though we deserve it or that we have arrived, we will watch our whole lives pass us by without ever stepping into the fullness of what God designed us for.
Choose today to step into truth and step into love.
