A Note from my Diary: Anxiety, Letting Go, and the Beautiful Mess in between

It’s the letting go I need to work on.

Let go. Relax. Rest. Trust. Embrace. Be embraced.

Let go of all that feels jumbled, messy, confusing, disorganized, consuming,

And learn to really trust and believe that He holds it all.

Trust Him that He writes and re-writes my story.

Trust that I won’t be lost in the letting go.

I will be found & free.

Found & free in the letting go.

Focus less on trying to keep it all straight and figure it all out.

Focus less on cleaning things up and tying a bow on everything.

Focus more on accepting the messy, the flawed, the confusing as a part of life,

And learning to see it all as beautiful.

Recognize the beauty of mess as an essential element of process & healing.

Recognize the beauty in myself as imperfect and vulnerable.

Recognize my limitations of not being the one in control,

And submitting my heart to the one who is.

Learning to trust & feel safe within the infinite bounds of his control.

Learn to embrace Him and allow Him to embrace me.

Learn to respond differently to fear, anxiety, & insecurity.

Learn to grasp not for control, more understanding, or a way to fix it,

But rather reach for His hand and an opportunity to see it from His heavenly vantage point.

Slow down.  Take a breath. Rest.

Recognize that feelings like worry & fear are transitory.

They come & they go.

This too shall pass.

Spiritual in nature, fear is not often dissuaded by logic, rationale, or reasoning.

But it is dissuaded by the presence of love showered down from heaven.

Learn to lean into the light that dispels darkness.

Lean into the love that dispels fear.

These are the truths I must remember.